Word Crimes

[Intro]
[C] [E7] [Am] [Fadd9] [C] [E7] [Am] [Fadd9]

[C]Everybody shut up
[E7]♪
[Am]Everyone listen up [Fadd9](hey-hey-hey, hey-hey-hey, hey-hey-hey)

[C]If you can't write [E7]in the proper way
[Am]If you don't [Fadd9]know how to conjugate
[C]Maybe you [E7]flunked that class
[Am]And maybe [Fadd9]now you find
[C]That people mock you [E7]online (everybody wise up)
[Am]Okay now here's the deal, [Fadd9]I'll try to educate ya
[C]Gonna familiarize you [E7]with the nomenclature
[Am]You'll learn the definitions [Fadd9]of nouns and prepositions
[C]Literacy's your mission
[E7]And that's why I [Am]think it's a good time
[Fadd9]To learn [C]some grammar (what)
[E7]Now did [Am]I stammer?
[Fadd9]Work on [C]that grammar
[E7]You should know when [Am]it's less or it's fewer
[Fadd9]Like people [C]who were
[E7]Never raised [Am]in a sewer
[Fadd9]I hate [C]these word crimes
[E7]Like I [Am]could care less
[Fadd9]That means [C]you do care
[E7]At least [Am]a little
[Fadd9]Don't be [C]a moron
[E7]You'd better slow down [Am]and use the right pronoun
[Fadd9]Show the world you're [C]no clown (everybody wise up)
[E7]Say you got an [Am]I-T followed by apostrophe S
[Fadd9]Now, what [C]does that mean?
[E7]You would not use "it's" in this [Am]case as a possessive (no, no, no)
[Fadd9]It's a contraction [C](yeah, yeah, yeah)
[E7]What's a contraction?
[Am]"Well, it's the [Fadd9]shortening of a word
[C]Or group of words by [E7]omission of a sound or letter"
[Am]Okay now, [Fadd9]here's some notes
[C]Syntax you're [E7]always manglin'
[Am]No "x" [Fadd9]in espresso
[C]Your participle's danglin'
[E7]But I don't [Am]want your drama
[Fadd9]If you really wanna, [C]leave out that Oxford comma
[E7]Just keep in mind [Am]that be, see, are, you
[Fadd9]Are words, [C]not letters
[E7]Get it together, [Am]use your spell checker
[Fadd9]You should never
[C]Write words [E7]using numbers
[Am]Unless you're seven, or [Fadd9]your name is Prince
[C]I hate [E7]these word crimes
[Am]You really need [Fadd9]a full-time proofreader
[C]You dumb mouth-breather
[E7]Well, you [Am]should hire
[Fadd9]Some cunning linguist
[C]To help you distinguish what [E7]is proper English (everybody wise up)
[Am]One thing I [Fadd9]ask of you
[C]The time to learn [E7]your homophones is past due
[Am]Learn to diagram [Fadd9]a sentence too
[C]Always say "to whom"; [E7]don't ever say "to who"
[Am]And listen up when [Fadd9]I tell you this
[C]I hope you never [E7]use quotation marks for emphasis
[Am]You finished second grade; [Fadd9]I hope you can tell
[C]If you're doing good or [E7]doing well (everybody wise up)
[Am]Better figure [Fadd9]out the difference
[C]Irony is [E7]not coincidence
[Am]And I thought that you'd [Fadd9]gotten it through your skull
[C]'Bout what's figurative [E7]and what's literal
[Am]Oh, but just now (just [Fadd9]now) you said (you said)
[C]You "literally couldn't get [E7]out of bed" (what)
[Am]That really makes [Fadd9]me wanna literally
[C]Smack a crowbar [E7]upside your stupid head
[Am]I read your [Fadd9]e-mail (yeah, yeah)
[C]It's quite apparent [E7]your grammar's errant
[Am]You're incoherent
[Fadd9]Saw your blog [C]post (hey, hey)
[E7]It's really fantastic
[Am]That was sarcastic (aw psych!) [Fadd9]'cause you write like a spastic
[C]I hate these word [E7]crimes (everybody wise up)
[Am]Your prose [Fadd9]is dopey
[C]Think you should [E7]only write in emoji
[Am]Oh, you're [Fadd9]a lost cause
[C]Go back to pre-school, get [E7]out of the gene pool
[Am]Try your best [Fadd9]to not drool
[C]Never mind, [E7]I give up
[Am]Really now, [Fadd9]I give up
[C](Hey-hey-hey)
[E7](Hey-hey-hey)
[Am](Go away)

Песня играется в оригинальной тональности C без каподастра.

Песня построена в тональности C. Вот 7 диатонических аккордов, гармонирующих между собой по теории музыки: